Yelp:  Where Boring Losers Review Things so they don’t Feel like such a Boring Loser

Yelp is a retarded website in which idiots and morons try to influence the opinions of other idiots and morons.

Any sensible person would laugh at the idiotic system of rating restaurants, services and other stuff but the morons flock to these to look at corrupt ratings and banter which is straight out of a special olympics coach’s mouth.

Like most online websites, especially ones with user generated content i.e. all social networks, review sites, and blogs yelp reviews have zero credibility and the people on the site are the yuppy scum and overall pieces of human excrement who should dig a hole and bury themselves in it after they fill it with their own feces.
Yelp Sucks and is one of 58 reasons to hate america.


30 responses to “Yelp

  1. reasonstohateamerica

    Yeah I said it… What?

  2. I hear you! That’s why were building a site that allows the business owners to monitor and reply back to posts. We’re not exactly a yelp-like site, but an online suggestion box for small businesses.

  3. screw yelp. they should down this god damn site because it ruins business by from a few comments of serious idiots out there who say crap about every little thing. these peopel who yelp have nothing better to do than to think they are god and say whatever they please. yes bury them and shit feces on these elite users

  4. they suck…at least somemone is doing something. more competitors.. bring it on…

  5. Philly Yelp Blows Philly Yelp Sucks
    YELP is a place where any jackass who craves attention will be coddled by a clot of clueless, nonsense, blabbering juveys. It’s a circle jerk for asshats.

  6. reasonstohateamerica

    Yes, Fu*k Yelp and Anyone who would use that disgrace of American Values.

  7. I think I’ve found something that makes me more angrier than those asshole drivers here in Los Angeles. That fucking site is so one-sided. It won’t let you make comments on others’ posts. You can only vote on a post about things that you think like:


    COME ON…what about things that I think like:

    *You need a life.
    *Go fuck yourself.
    *You need to get hogtied and a dick in your mouth.

    And what the fuck are elite users? Are they some unemployed assholes living off their rich parents that have nothing to do, but to write reviews on yelp all day? Well, FUCK YOU!

  8. reasonstohateamerica

    Thank you, I will say it again… Fuck YELP

    58 Reasons to Hate Yelp… Coming soon

    By the way


  9. YELP = Yuppy Internet Troll Community

  10. reasonstohateamerica >>>>>>>>>> yelp

  11. Oh yeah…I forgot to add this to the list.

    *Do humanity a flavor and die.

  12. Johnny Jerkoff

    Yelp sucks a big black donkey nob.

  13. Fuck Yelp. Yelp sucks. They are not only bad for businesses (but selectively GOOD for the ones that PAY), they are authoritarian and infuriating in the way they deal with you if you join to post your reviews. I tried that, and have now canceled my account after I realized they were selectively suppressing some of my reviews… NOT for violations of TOS – but for some other reasons connected to their behind-the-scenes agenda.

  14. reasonstohateamerica

    Fuck Yelp

    That site is a disgrace and should be taken off the internet, not to mention all the yuppy-scum losers who use it should take a cyanide pill and simultaneously blow their brains out while in a garage w/ a hose attached to the exhaust of their car pumping CO in their bitch ass lungs.

  15. It’s a forum for idiots who don’t get what they want (or had in their mind) from a business. But other idiots go to the business and see poor reviews, when it’s not really representative of the business as a whole.


  16. is there anyway to actually fuck ‘with’ yelp? a slew of fake reviews to great restaurants and have them cause hell, or somehow stuff their inboxs with spam or hate mail???

  17. got it! So everyone needs to write as many reviews on their cities top restaurants as possible, all giving them one star and write something along the lines of “hated the food, the peacock bisque was divine!” Maybe this is a way to make idiots out there realize what yelp really is, a listed forum for regular people to pretend they know something about anything!

    The real reson I hate yelp: innocent vendors and restaurants are suffering just so wanna be food writer jack asses can write a little blurb about how they didn’t think the au jus sauce had flavor…au jus refers to the sauce you dick fucks!! Get a clue and stop trying to make youself feel significant, significunts!

  18. this website is to one sided it’s bullshit. customers can get away with murder now that yelp is here. common saying is lower my bill or else i will shred you on yelp. fuck yelp.

  19. Mmm Yelp is under lots of pressure now from the Class Action Lawsuit on them! please sign up and let put pressure on them .

    We all know that most of yelp users are cry baby looser got nothing better to do but trash businesses and that cost all of lots of $$

  20. reasonstohateamerica

    I’d like to quote the author to confirm:

    “yelp reviews have zero credibility and the people on the site are the yuppy scum and overall pieces of human excrement who should dig a hole and bury themselves in it after they fill it with their own feces.”

  21. fuck yelp. they call business for money and if you dont pay for their ‘service’ they will delete all the good ratings on ur business and then make ur restraunt look like shit… a victim of their call.. i thought it was a joke.. wtf?

  22. I agree with every comment on this site about Yelp except for a few. First of all calling these idiots yuppies with trust funds is giving them too much credit. If they were yuppies they would have jobs and clearly they don’t. I also doubt that they have trust funds since their spelling and grammar is so poor I don’t see any education behind them. As far as what I would like to see done to all of the “Elite” bastards……
    I agree with all of the posts above and then some.
    Having said that we need to do something to stop this. They are destroying lives. Yelp is anti buisiness. We need to get organized. We need to get a voice. I am willing to take this to congress if I have to! I am tired of being abused and held hostage by idiots that don’t even understand my business. Everyday now I have someone who comes into the stores that demands a discount or doesn’t like the way someone looks at them and then they threaten me with Yelp. I actually had someone say that they “write” for Yelp. Are they a journalist? These idiots have been given too much of a voice, we are attacking the wrong people. Yes the “Elites” need to fall of the face of the earth, they will not be missed. But the person that is to blame is JEREMY STOPPLEMAN! He is the problem, he is the man without a soul that has given every idiot a voice! He is to blame and he needs to pay for what he has done!
    We need to get organized people if we want this to stop. We need to have anit Yelp rallys. We need to throw out customers that write about us on Yelp. We still have the right to refuse service as long as it’s posted. We have to reclaim our businesses!!! For my part I have been writing to the small businesss administration of America and even to the White House. I am so disgusted and depressed at this point that I am ready to close my business. I hate what is going on!!!
    Let’s do something about this asshole. I am also angry at Google and Microsoft for offering this little bastard 700 million to buy him out!
    He actually turned them down so that he can still keep running the site for a very long time.
    He needs to be stopped! Laws need to be put in place to protect businesses from sites like these.
    I should have the right to have my business placed on the site if I want to or to have it removed. It is my business and I am the one who worked hard to build it!
    What is wrong with people? That is my question.

  23. seriously, yelp is just gay.

    people are snarky, rude, and secretly wish they had a real job. Instead they are sitting in their dorm rooms listening to Kesha. Like, OMG…Best sushi EVAR!!!

    Fuck off, no one cares about your opinions.

  24. Yelp is finally being sued for constantly harassing businesses to buy advertising on their site.
    Many of us want our businesses removed, so that we are not subject to the whim of people who feel empowered to do what ever they want to whomever they want.
    Unfortunately, until the government steps in to create guidelines and rules for reviewing people, we have to live with companies like yelp that are run by egomaniacs and support egomaniacs.

  25. for someone who is so against all this american stuff you sure use “profanitys” and use the internet to voice YOUR opinion, while people on yelp arent allowed to, and calling people rich yuppies is fucking retarded, they did well in life you are just pissed at america that your life SUCKS ASS

    • reasonstohateamerica

      Go edit your yelp profile and suck some cock you inbred piece of trash

      • “Like most online websites, especially ones with user generated content i.e. all social networks, review sites, and BLOGS yelp reviews have zero credibility”

        Hi friend, you realize you write a blog, right? Just making sure we’re on the same page.

  26. You all make me laugh! What happened to you that you hate so much, it is a negative emotion that will ruin your life far more than anything on Yelp.

    After I got a BS Bad review on Yelp I laughed, then a funny thing happened… I provided top notch service to my clientele and, guess what, positive reviews out numbered the bitter little twit and her Husband that wrote malicious reviews. Take care of the customer and they will write positive reviews, treat em like crap and well…

    Seems to me like a lot of you have a piss poor attitude and that may be the key to your poor ratings?

  27. You all are killing. Such weird anger focused on a group of varied people. All of these odd generalizations. It’s weird that you think people only leave negative comments when there are 5 star places. It’s weird that you thinke veryoen is rich when you can see people talking about how expensive a place is. It’s really weird that you are complaining about people complaining on a website. Last I checked, this is a website and what you’re doing looks a whole lot like complaining. Weird.

  28. On a web site… in a thread.. on my birthday, no less

    Some guy took a pot shot, regarding my death.

    “Oh, I wish”, he did say.

    Oh. My. God. What a mess!

    So now (and forever)..across it’s width and it’s breath

    I’m “FORBIDDEN FROM ACCESS”…That’s all the screen shows

    Yet….I meant what I said and I said what I meant

    And, to the poser…the stone thrower…

    This cat says, “Get bent!”

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